Resistance and Resilience. A Writer's Tale of Perseverance
The Balancing Act of Family, Career, and Authorial Dreams
Sometimes, it feels like the day job conspires against my writing dreams. Here I am, brain-fried from a relentless work week, staring at a blank screen—but then, that struggle is exactly what we need to write about.
My AI assistants take the role of experienced editors; just what they are experienced in is open to debate; the actual writing is all human me. It’s fun seeing how the different Gen AI models sometimes give contradictory advice.
Balancing Work and Writing Aspirations
It’s been a heavy week again for the day job. I usually work Monday through Thursday, eight hours a day. Yet again, this week, there were so many urgent tasks, leaving zero time for writing. It has been over-the-top busy like this since the beginning of June, at least, with most weeks topping out and exceeding the contracted hours.
Nevertheless, I have been busy building the writing processes for short—and long-form pieces. They are distinct; very little of the short-form process applies to the larger writing projects. The weekly process has largely been worked out for the newsletter, but even this has not been possible this week.
Instead, I have no choice but to fall back on an earlier experiment and write free-form. When I sat down ten minutes ago, booted up the laptop, and scanned through the dozens of ideation notes, nothing struck me as all that interesting. The mental exhaustion from the day job had robbed me of any feeling to write. Still, I want to write something; I owe it to myself if nothing else.
Now, what can I write about this week? It struck me that writing about the difficulties of sitting down and doing the work was, perhaps, the way to go. After all, for many of us writers, juggling our lifestyles, responsibilities, and commitments is a constant problem. I’m not moaning; it’s just how things are.
Navigating Unsupportive Waters
Of course, this also means no progress on the novel, apart from one short dictated note recorded at the beginning of the week. It doesn’t help that my family is unsupportive of my writing ambitions. Occasionally, they seem to be deliberately obstructive. As far as they are concerned, it’s a waste of time if it doesn’t earn any money. They have a point to a certain extent, I suppose.
The way I see it, I love doing this; it’s my private time, my escape if you like. Writing the book is fun and hard work, too, but I need time to get back into the flow every time I sit down. I know I’ll get there eventually; the world revealed will become more real and enticing as the book develops. I’ll be thinking about the story in most idle moments. But I’m not there yet. Soon, I hope.
The Ebb and Flow of Creative Passion
I was so into the emerging world when I started writing my first book in 2017. It was a joy to write; a short fifteen minutes was enough to satisfy, however briefly, the need to return to the story. That first novel was my passion project, but a serious illness cut short the work, leaving the first draft about a quarter to a third done.
I rediscovered the joy of writing several years later, starting this newsletter (through several brand iterations) in early 2023. It was my way to push back the Resistance that had, until then, been quashing any creative impulses I’d had. But Resistance is trying to make a comeback.
At the beginning of this year (2024), I was ready to pick up fiction writing again. In the six years plus since I had paused writing the first book (just until I recovered, I told myself), I’d already learned much about the art (writing, of course) that I didn’t want to risk screwing up the passion project. Instead, I started a new novel in the same genre. The passion for this book hasn’t yet materialized, but I live in hope.
I briefly mentioned Steven Pressfield’s book “The War of Art” two weeks ago. At the time, I wasn’t all that impressed. But I pressed on; it warmed up quickly. It’s interesting to realize the many facets of Resistance and how it surfaces in subtle and often incomprehensible ways. Forewarned is forearmed, as they say. Contrary to my first thoughts on the book, I highly recommend it.
It would be naive to think that Resistance is on the back foot just by reading a book about it. However, simply being aware of its multiple faces does bolster our defenses. This will be a never-ending war, but we mustn’t ever consider surrender.
Adapting to Life's Realities
Where do we go from here? Realistically, I don’t have the luxury of time-blocking creative time every day. Not even on the weekends. The best I can do at the moment is to reserve four hours every Sunday for fiction writing. If I’m fortunate enough to write at other times of the week, the self-discipline of retreating to my office, even for ten minutes, will be a welcome bonus.
Naturally, this impacts the planned completion of the first draft, something that must be accepted. Otherwise, I’ll be beating myself up constantly for missing my targets. Speaking of targets, when I configured the Scrivener project several months ago, I set a planned first draft completion date, together with the project and session word count targets. Big mistake. All this does is pile on the pressure. The best thing I can do now is turn off the entire project planning and see how it goes over the coming months.
Wearing The Editor’s Hat
Completing the first draft is not even half the work for a first book. After resting the manuscript for a week or two, we must change hats and become editors. This is where the Story Grid methodology will come into its own. I’ve read the book, listened to many early podcasts, and learned much.
The essential thing about the editing process is not to edit anything. That statement sounds contradictory, doesn’t it? The concept is simple, though. When going through the manuscript as an editor, we must never correct anything, not even typos. Instead, we must note them, highlight them, and otherwise mark up the text in whichever way we feel most comfortable with. The second draft is the time for hands-on corrections and rewrites, not while editing the first. The entire editing process repeats once the second draft is complete, and so on.
The Long Game
Who knows how many times I’ll have to go through these processes, but I certainly hope not too many. On the positive side, the second draft (and third, etc.) should move a lot quicker than the first. By then, the world exists in our creative minds’ eye, the narrative is known, and even if it doesn’t yet work as a story, we know what to do to make it work.
In contrast, the first draft is about discovery, whether you are a plotter or a pantser. When we begin, we only have the vaguest ideas about the story. Consequently, it takes much longer to get it down on paper. I’m guessing here, having not yet reached this stage, but I live in hope.
Final Thoughts
This is what I love about writing: the discovery and insights that surface in our creative psyche, especially when free-writing. It’s been interesting and great fun letting myself go and trusting in emergence.
I honestly had no idea what I would write about when I sat down earlier; I needn’t have worried (not that I did; I knew something would come to me). I went from having zero ideas to over a thousand words in almost no time. Not bad at all for someone who was at a loss a few hours ago.
From feeling utterly drained to diving into topics like life's chaos, writing passions, and battling that pesky Resistance - all in one sitting. It just goes to show that sometimes you've got to push through the mental fog and just start typing. But remember this: every word you write, even when you're dog-tired or feeling uninspired, is a victory. It's you showing up for your passion, despite the odds.
If you're scribbling notes during your lunch break or burning the midnight oil, keep at it. Your story matters. And who knows? Maybe next time you're feeling stuck, you'll remember this little chat we had and think, "If that idiot can do it, so can I." Now, go write something brilliant - or terrible. Just write.
Hopefully, you enjoyed this post. If you want to say ‘thank you, ‘ the best way is to get involved in the comments. And my promise to you…If you get in touch, I will answer! So comment away… (a subscription is also nice)